


I mean... he has a Wikipedia page

by emmykay



Category: Check Please! (Webcomic)
Genre: Family, Gen, OC, Some Humor
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-07-23
Updated: 2014-08-02
Packaged: 2018-02-12 06:32:36
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 968
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2099172
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/emmykay/pseuds/emmykay
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Because Bad Bob Zimmermann deserves an actual Wikipedia page.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bob_Zimmermann

**Author's Note:**

> Based on the great webcomic [Check, Please!](http://omgcheckplease.tumblr.com/) Thanks so much for sharing your work with us, Ngozi!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Bad Bob Zimmermann's Wikipedia page.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Since I read [ the page](http://omgcheckplease.tumblr.com/post/58305417930) about Bad Bob Zimmermann's Wikipedia page, I really really wanted there to be one. So I made it.
> 
> First posted this bad manip on my tumblr - I apologize for quality, but this was as good as the screen cap of the original image got.

[](http://imageshack.com/f/ewkpV7Zcp)  


Actual text:

Robert “Bob” Zimmermann, CC OQ (born January 16, 1956) is a Canadian former professional ice hockey player and former head coach of a professional hockey team. He played 20 seasons in the National Hockey League (NHL) for three teams from 1975-1993. Nicknamed “Bad Bob” for his aggressive style of play, he has been called one of “the best offensive linemen ever” by many sports journalists and historians. At the time of his retirement, he held 24 NHL records. 

Born in La Tuque, Quebec, Canada, the third of eight children to a paper mill worker and his wife, Zimmerman first started playing pond hockey as a very young child, encouraged by his large extended family. He quickly attained the speed and stature that would make him stand out in amongst his peer group. His parents moved to Montreal for his training once his talent became apparent. His ability to handle the puck and execute shots in difficult situations as well as his simple approach to homelife and easy-going attitude gave him the ironic nickname “Bad.”

Drafted in 1975, he went on to lead the Montreal Canadiens to the Stanley Cup three times. He was traded in 1978 to the then-newly moved Calgary Flames, members of the Pacific Division of the Western Conference of the National Hockey League (NHL). He was made captain and his skills were used to build up the team and led to their first conference championship. He was then traded to the Pittsburgh Penguins where he went on to lead the team in back-to-back Stanley Cups in 1991 and 1992.

Post-retirement [edit]

Zimmermann was inducted into the Hockey Hall of Fame in 1999. He was on the coaching staff of the Ottawa Senators 1996-2003. He was on the Olympic committee and was key to bringing the Olympics to Calgary. He is on the board of many charities, and regularly makes appearances on the CBC covering hockey.

Business ventures [edit]

Zimmermann has invested in a number of different ventures including: TimDoughs, a chain of doughnut shops, the Maritime golf course, and a Christmas tree farm. He has had lucrative endorsements with Canadian Tire.

Personal life [edit]

Zimmermann married his childhood sweetheart, Janine Corriveaux, in 1979. Corriveaux’s father, Martin Corriveaux, played for the Montreal Junior Canadiens 1933-1938. Zimmermann has one son, Jack.

(and in the box, it reads:

Born: January 16,1957 (age 56), La Tuque, QC, Canada

Height: 6 ft 1 in (185 cm)

Weight: 195 lbs (88.45 kg)

Position: Centre

Shot: Right

Played for: NHL, Montreal Canadiens, Calgary Flames, Pittsburgh Penguins

National team: Canada

Playing career: 1975-1995

Website: (with link to official website)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (forgive me, I actually know nothing about hockey or sports or anything about going outside. Totally cribbed off a bunch of other hockey player’s wikipedia pages. If there are mistakes, I will happily correct.)


	2. Corrections, please (or wiki-oops)

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> _Somebody_ has found errors in the Bob Zimmermann Wikipedia entry. That person was not Bob Zimmermann.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I made some mistakes on the fake Wikipedia entry on Bad Bob Zimmermann. Here's a ficlet as an apology.

"Papa, it says 1956 and 1957 - some dumbass must have been editing your Wikipedia page! There are so many mistakes!"

Bob placed a hand on his forehead and sighed as he leaned against the door frame, holding the phone up to his ear. "It's not a big deal."

Janine looked over from the living room couch, where she was sitting with her laptop. Her eyebrows rose in a question.

"Jack," Bob mouthed, pointing at the mouthpiece while maintaining his 'soothing young ruffled teammate' voice. "Son, I'm sure those were written by people who didn't think that anybody would be really reading that and were just excited about hockey and hockey history - "

"It's Wikipedia! It's where everybody gets their information!"

"Maybe it's just a typo, or a little carelessness. People understand that about Wikipedia isn't perfect -"

Jack barreled on. "You're old so you won't get it but it's kind of a big deal these days -"

"I suppose you're right," Bob said calmly. "My advanced age does keep me at home and away from the light of knowledge borne by youth." It appeared his sarcasm didn't make a dent as his son continued speaking.

"They never said when you got traded to the Penguins! It's all wrong!"

"You don't have to take it so seriously, Jack."

"And you didn't win the Cup with the Flames - you couldn't have." Jack's voice rose with renewed self-righteous indignation. "There are articles about you that they could have looked up. And the writing is terrible."

"Well, why don't you get to working on fixing that, then, if it makes you feel better," Bob said.

"Don't think I won't." Then, almost as an afterthought, "Say hi to Maman for me. Bye."

"I'll tell her. Bye, Jack." Bob put down the phone, sighing. He went to flop down next to his wife, throwing an arm over his face.

"What was that?" Janine asked. "I could hear his voice from across the room. Is something the matter?"

"Someone on the internet is wrong." Bob rolled his eyes. "My Wikipedia page needs saving."

"Oh." Janine sat back. "That all?"

"And he's fixing it right now."

"He always was so intense." She sighed. "Everything was black or white, right or wrong. No sense of humor, no allowances for human frailty."

"He also says hi."

"Oh, yeah? After all that about you, just hi for me?" Janine asked.

"He basically told me I was old and out of touch because I don't computer," Bob countered.

"So, what was wrong with the article?"

"The year I was born and when I left the Flames."

"Well, you were eighteen when you were drafted, so 1956, and we left Calgary in - "

Bob shrugged. "To be fair, the management waited until the very last minute to agree to the trade -" At the sound of her rapid typing, he interrupted himself to ask, "What're you doing?"

"Just seeing what's wrong with the entry." She made a few thoughtful noises. Then, a mischievous look in her blue eyes, she asked, "What're we going to do with that extra year?"

Bob grinned, matching her look with a wicked one of his own. "I've always wanted to play for Detroit."

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I have so much headcanon about Papa and Maman Zimmermann, you guys. They meet as kids while playing pond hockey and he thinks it's an all-boys game. He playing against this awesome center, and after he beats the other team, he goes up to the center and tries to talk to him to play again. Then the center takes off his disgusting Canadiens toque and then Bob realizes "...it's a girl!" A girl with messy stringy sweat-darkened short blonde hair that is sticking to her face and head and she's got a scowl and mean wind-chafe skin thing going on. And he's all stunned lovestruck anime eyes, but she's not taking it from him because she lost. She lost to some new kid! He does a lot to try to make it up to her.


End file.
